Note: I have also posted this on Adventures to the Altar. I felt it was appropriate for both blogs because it does involve a book. Apologies for the redundancy in the event that you follow both. And also, thank you for following both!
E and I are not associated with any specific house of religion, and Wayfarers Chapel belongs to the Swedenborgian Church, which is a fairly liberal Protestant church. Most pre-marital counseling is associated with faith. We will be able meeting with the minister who will be performing our ceremony in a few months, but in the meantime, I decided to ease into the waters of pre-marital counseling by reading The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman.
I thought it was a quick read that reminded me to be aware of the ways that I show love to E. And it also helped me to realize what I seek out to feel loved. After I read it, I passed it on to E. We discussed the book, and E’s opinion was that it was helpful for people who were already married or not yet engaged. That made me laugh because, of course, we fall into the in-between of engaged. He did also say that it made him aware of his love language, and that he was curious about mine. We took the test, and I actually scored pretty evenly in three languages. Of course, I would be terribly indecisive. It’s so like me.
But I like to think it’s because I feel so loved that my “love tank” is full, and any one of those actions from E only adds to it. (So mushy!) All in all, I am glad that E and I both read this book, and it makes me feel comfortable with trying more pre-marital workbooks in the future. E and I are very open with each other and often discuss our hopes and dreams for our future together, especially when we disagree. I don’t expect any huge surprises as we move forward with our “counseling,” but maybe writing things down, on our own, will force us to think about what we truly want from our marriage together.
Have you read The Five Love Languages? Have you participated in pre-marital counseling? How do you find it? How does your significant other find it? Sound off below.