Cry, Crybaby

My instinctual emotional release is crying. It used to be laughing, but that was really awkward because my laughter got near to hysteric levels in order to avoid crying. So I gave into crying. And I feel free. But people who easily give into tears are often (not always) deemed strange and weak and a whole host of other not so cool things.

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But really, I’ll leave it up to you. I mean, I will continue to cry so it’s not like your judgement will stop me.

I cry when:

  • other people cry. I am a sympathetic crier, and this always triggers my tears.
  • something is SO cute, I feel like my heart might explode, but then my lachrymal glands do instead. Like puppies.
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  • I see injustice. Movies, the news, anything. I get really sad for the world.
  • good characters die in movies and books. Rue’s death puts me in the fetal position. I was sobbing in the movie theater and couldn’t stop.
  • I laugh really hard. Most people get this.
  • someone is trying to give me a pep talk. Why are you so emphatic about what I need to do? Why do I need a pep talk to accomplish it? Why do I feel tears? Am I inspired? Am I scared? Am I shamed? Is it all of these things? Probably.
  • I am embarrassed.
  • I am frustrated.
  • I am startled. I don’t like when things jump out at me.
  • movie problems are too close to real-life problems. And I don’t mean my real-life problems that are happening. But real-life problems that might happen.
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  • my work day is bad.
  • my friends are going through hard times.
  • I see friends I haven’t seen in a long time.
  • I graduate from college. I only did this once, but my tears were prompted by mom’s prideful tears. I’m sure you can now understand from whom I have inherited this blessing.
  • I read.
  • I am tickled.
  • I am feeling so in love.
  • any wedding video begins to play
  • the fireworks go off at Disneyland. And when World of Color happens at Disneyland. And when the Queen of Hearts traumatizes me at Disneyland.
  • balloons hit me in the face. Surprisingly, this has only occurred once at Disneyland. Several times in other places.
  • I feel panic.
  • I miss my family.
  • I experience other people’s love.
  • it’s not expected, in moments before it is expected. Like the recording session before the last concert. Or the rehearsal dinner instead of the wedding.
  • I feel proud of myself.
  • Grey’s Anatomy is on. Actually, Grey’s is my designated 42 minutes of crying per week accompanied by particularly moving episodes of The Biggest Loser.
  • I think things are exceptionally beautiful.

This list probably doesn’t even cover all of it, but it’s a lot of times to cry in a life. I know it’s weird, but I feel relieved that I know exactly what will make me feel better sometimes. A good cry has healing powers. Sometimes, it’s a couple of tears. And sometimes, I just let it all out. Unfortunately, crying is kind of frowned upon, and needs its own private time. I am not a whiny b&*^%. I just feel lots of things and I would rather feel them than not. So I cry a lot. Whatever.

Do you cry a lot too? Or is it just me and my crazy family?


2 responses

  1. I love this list. And you. Even more now after having read it. I cannot even begin to tell you how many times I have started crying in weird strange places. But, I can tell you that two of those times occurred on airplanes while reading wonderful books. The first was The Road. The second was the day I moved/flew to LA. I was reading the fifth Percy Jackson book. Both times I was Sobbing (with a capitol S). The second time the stewardess brought me a huge pile of napkins, and I used

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